Before we start, I just want to send my condolences to the families and victims of the massacre in Florida. If you're going out to celebrate Pride, please, please, carry some form of protection. If these bastards are going to start targeting the community, start shooting back!
Now, let us begin with Microsoft's Press Conference:
E3 2016 is finally here. It seems like only yesterday E3 2015 was on, and although it seemed truncated, even with the addition of a Bethdesda press Confereence, it's seemed like the last one just happened, and it's a shock, an absolute shock, that Fallout 4 is nearly a year old. Now we look towards brand-new games,some of them being huge secrets, others being leaked too early to ever be anything morer than reiterations. Today, we see if there are games that will set the world on fire, or more bad press releases that make the whole world cry.
First, we start off with the Microsoft Press Conference. Again, this press conference was the first one I've seen so-far, and I'm very, very disappointed with it, and even I of if don't like Microsoft, I give this one here an E for Effort, but an F for Entertainment. Everything they showed seemed to be a ripoff, blatantly so, of what is going to be coming off exclusively for other consoles. I make the claim thwt in-fact, nothing is truly original anymore, but I will say the only game that looks interesting is one we knew about since mid 2015, and that is We Happy Few. This game looks amazing, has a Bioshock-like atmosphere, an original story that looks to be gripping, compelling, and the idea that choosing to take a drug, or not taking the drug will affect the gameplay around you. I've been interested in this game since it was first shown off, and I remember it hinted at last year as well. What aggravates me though is that it seems an entire year had gone by, and no games have been actually released this year.
Microsoft wasn't bad this year, they were terrible....Microsoft being typical Microsoft, pandering to such an extremely minute part of the gaming community, it's enough to make y think they don't know anything about gaming! From Gears ofWar 4, with barely any excitement from the crowd, to Sea of Thieves, Rare Software's newest attempt at a modern "big game", there's seems to be big power plays that go off in different failing directions. It's just a shame to me that everything shown that was an exclusive, and then trying to save faith by announcing that anything bought once will play simultaneously on both PC and Console, makes me think that XBox wants to get away from a console, and just focus on the PC market, which would be wonderful! The a project Scorpio announcment is seen by many gamers who are fans of the company as a bold move, a marketing strategy that breaks the mold, but let's call it what it is: nobody owns an Xbox One, mostly because people felt screwed last generation cycle with the red ring of death, and that was apparent when PS4 wrecked the mark. Now we are finally getting several games that look enticing on all systems, and Microsoft wants to pretend like that last knockout didn't happen. This is called denial.
But enough with bashing a company that infuriates me, because this is E3, and even the broken, I articulate seamstress that can't even weave a game that doesn't have a numeral following its title, is allowed to be the Belle of the Ball, even if for just an hour. So let's enjoy this take on Microsoft's Press Conference, but let's make haste! Because when the clock strikes at midnight, Dbox One will be better used as placeholder for a pumpkin.
The conference opened up with Gears of War 4, a game franchise that was created by Cliffy B, and I'll just leave thwt for you good readers contemplate, since I'm far from his even most spiteful fan. My adoration for this series is about as buried as a troglodyte fossil run over with molten lava, and casted off into the fiery pits of Hell. I don't like this game, nor do I like the particular gameplay shown. Even the crowd was anything but enthusiastic, the game just looks to be made for five people living in Santa Monica, and the people who made it seem to be distraught about their own work. The game was very boring, unimpressive, and lacking in anything I would expect from a AAA title. It makes me feel bad for the power Project Scorpio is supposed to carry, and the lackluster games that will flood it until it too is seen as another Sega Dreamcast...except the Dreamcast was fun to play!
Sorry, I know I said I was done bashing Microsoft, I know I wasn't supposed to take sides, but when the only thing good you show off isn't an Xbox Exclusive (We Happy Few) something tells me thwt sea of thieves, and another season of Killer Instincts, which doesn't hold a candle to Mortal Kombat, and never did. Still, this was the second major announcment, and that with a few other characters, Gears of War's General Raam was announced as a playable, special character in the upcoming new season of Killer instinct.
Next was a look at Forza Horizon 3, showcasing multiplayer, and introducing multiplayer co-op. The racer looked okay, the graphics weren't as refined as I was hoping, but racing around the continent of Austraila looked interesting enough. And the fact that the game works in real time, the game is not bad for a racer. It is also available for both Xbox and Windows 10, and like most of these exclusives, if you buy it once, you get Crossplay so it's available September 27th on both console and PC. I'm personally not a fan of racing games, so I cannot really give much opinion on how this one compares to former titles. Overall, the game looks fine, and the physics seem more real world than the very first Forza I've played. So it does seem to improve.
Next is a game that was also an exclusive title for Xbox, and it seems to be a mixture of Boderlands, with a touch of Horizon,mand a open-world MMORPG although what I've seen seems to be only single player. The game is called Recore, and comes out September 18th. Recore looks okay, and has a very Beyond Good and Evil aspect in design, but if it wasn't a Gearbox game,you could've fooled me. It was just a teaser, so I can't judge,mor begrudge it in any way, but it looks solid, and I believe it's designed for Crossplay as well.
The next game shown was Final Fantasy XV, which is not an exclusive, but it will be released first on the Xbox One. I've seen FFXV before with gameplay nearly half a year ago, and it looks good, and has a different fighting engine, almost like Shadow of the Colossus had, but it's nothing short of a beautiful-looking game. Even the story looks to be more a reimagining than a true sequel. Still, the battle against the titan creature, which was like a rock/shard giant looks pretty damn cool, and it was called Trial of Titan, and brought me back to those PS2 days of Shadow of the Colossus. Team Ico would be blushing with flattery over this enriched imitation.
Moving on to the next game, is an Ubisoft title: Tom Clancy's The Division Underground, new missions exclusively first on Xbox One, which really doesn't mean anything. It was just a short little teaser, but doesn't look to add anything to a game that is as controversial as it is polarizing.
The next game is far more exciting, Battlefield 1, which takes place during one of the worst wars in human history: World War I. Perhaps my most favorite war to learn about, and just what hell people had to go through. Still, this game looks to be fairly accurate, and a time in history that most people have not seen played out on a game console. It was one of the most devastating wars in history, and took place on almost every continent. There were little rules of engagement, and the amount of horrors that were felt created the first-known type of PTSD: Shellshock. If you want a rousing take on just what happened during the First World War, watch Apocalypse WWI, it's usually on History channel, or you can look it up online, it's about six episodes, all about an hour or so in length. Still, this game looks to be very exciting, and I'm no fan of FPS, in-fact I avoid them like the proverbial plague. Players can get access first via EA Acess exclusively on Xbox One starting October 13th. The dogfights look pretty damn cool, and the zepplin that was brought down in the end didn't do as much particle damage on the town below as I hoped,mbut the game looks legitimately fun, and precise to the history. Being the history buff that I am, I kinda hope it gives you the jarring feeling of trench warfare, and the European campaigns that we're fought almost bareknuckle. The French fought the majority of the war with English allies, but I feel most of that will be left out, because trench warfare was mostly the beginning, and very, very end of the war, when the Sherman Tanks were introduced with Patton leading the charge. It should be interesting to see just how they play this particular war out in game form, because it was a highly controversial war at it's time, and has still very I'll effects on our cultures today. To put it bluntly, Germany has just barely paid off it's reperation for WWI, and most likely won't pay off for WWII until the mid-to-late 2000s. So just because I doubt another WWI game will be made, this may be a game worth picking up and trying out for the sheer antiquity of the experience.
After something so awesome as Battlefield 1, they had to talk about something shitty: Xbox Live, although Backwards Compatibility is what might be hurting PS4, and the concept of having Cortana on Xbox is not that impressive. Still, Microsoft has then added a bunch of garbage I really don't want to get into, like Xbox Arena, for competitive online gaming,because it's the it thing, and the looking for group, which back in my day was called a chatroom, or a forum. It was the lowest level that the press Confereence sunk, except for Halo Wars 2, that just looked like a sad, sad shame, and I'll speak nothing more of either of these travesties. They claim these are the most requested features, but it seems like pandering, becaue I believe most gamers have a core group they play with, but most just want to get famous for playing video games, and, sadly; we all cannot be famous for this particular trend,mshich is dying as quickly as it built up, and most gamers who stream do it via PC regardless of console choice.
Next was a "friendly update" quote the "friendliest update ever" by the creepiest woman I've ever seen for Minecraft Realms. Ugh, I'm not ten years old, so Minecraft isn't that appealing to me, but it respect the concept, and the convention fanaticism. Still, this update that will make you mod the blocks to look more modern, and to turn zombies into aliens....not gonna lie, it's pretty dumb, I take it this was something an intern suggested, and they just decided to go and fix it...Minecraft has really sunk since Mojang let it go, but he's a multi-billionaire now, so I can respect selling out for that amount. I won't delve further, but it's good for that core group of gamers that likes Minecraft...I guess? Of course Crossplay is in effect, and this is an obvious "duh!" On my part. Also the hosting of servers specifically for crating and sharing worlds is a good touch. We will see if these updates work out later this year. Minecraft Realms works on multiple devices, and is available now. The V.R. was a good touch too.
Oh Christ! The damn candy remotes are back! Ugh! Why do I need you to customize for me a controller? I understand personalization, but it's a trendy horseshit idea that only goes to amp up the prices on overcharged bullshit controllers already. Watch them go for about two hundred US dollars or something now. I'm kidding, I'm sure it'll be more like a tewnty dollar difference, but I prefer the skins you can buy, and replace whenever you want to customize a controller.
Next is a game from the creators of Limbo...not sure if it's only available for Xbox One, but it's Microsoft Exclusive: I side, and it will be out allegedly by June 29th. Also, Limbo is free right now on Xbox One. Inside is pretty much a noir concept that seems to involve industry and corporate infrastructure. Hard to tell but for art, it looked palpable. Seeing it releases in two weeks, answers will be arriving shortly on if it's a good/bad indie title. Seeing as it's coming from the creators of Limbo though, it should be a marvelous experience for the indie game fans.
Next up was a multitude of indie titles in a flash-style montage run through of them all. Games like outlast, Deliever Us The Moon, and Flint Hook to name a few. Far, Slime Rancher, Shadow Tactics, Figment, The Culling, For the King, Beacon, Stardew Valley, Hand of Fate 2, Below, Raiders, Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night, Yooka-Laylee, Everspace, and the first one mentioned: Cuphead, are all games that will be out on Xbox Live, and really all of them are either good or bad from the five seconds of each game I've seen. That's still a lot of games to announce.
Next up is a game I've mentioned already called We Happy Few, which was given a good portion of both teaser trailer, gameplay, and love demonstration at the conference. Not sure if this game is going to be for all systems, but it's perhaps the biggest surprise for me, becaue of it's unique gameplay, and almost caricature style. The game also takes place in the sixties, so it has a Bioshock centric timeline as well, even though it's not a 2K game. This was followed by Gwent the card game,which I didn't really care much for, and little was shown/explained, and also Tekken 7 followed with Aluma of Street Fighter becoming a playable character, and some gameplay followed.
Dead Rising 4 was the next exclusive, and it looks to take place during Christmas time, and just as ridiculous as it's precious titles. It'll be a great game for thirteen year old boys, but it's not something that has any serious substance. It releases holiday 2016. Truthfully, I found the little teaser trailer to be okay, but it was lackluster. Then came in Scalebound, and I saw every cliche imaginable...yes, a giant fucking scorpion, and riding the backs of dragons...no, I'm not describing an 80s metal band album cover. Ugh, please let this be over soon. That battle drew out so long, I could live the rest of my lie and not see it again. Also I hate that the characters kept talking it out, hoping that's not in the final development and was for E3 exclusively, it was very annoying.
Sea of Theives was next, and as I mentioned before it's like a pirate MMORPG. Not much more to say after that then, so moving on....it seemed the best was over, then Microsoft went and did something they always do: showed off a teaser for State of Decay, and I knew that this was it: Halo Wars 2 would pretty much end the conference, and I'd have to wait for Sony's rebuttal. Honestly, it looks like Halo ripped off Starcraft!
Of course the announcements weren't over, Project Scorpio ended the conference, claiming to become the most powerful system ever built, and that made me laugh because it only has current generation consoles to compare to, not next generation consoles it will have to compete with, this is just a sign that Microsoft wants out of this hellhole they've put themselves in by losing the current console war,it's equivalent to starting a war with a country, losing, then starting a war with another country to help fund the war you're currently losing. Sega did this in the past with the Saturn, and Sega Cd, and Dreamcast, this will prove to be an unwise decision on Microsoft's part. If I build a system tomorrow, and claim it's the most powerful ever built, it kinda doesn't matter if it's a Barnum statement, or fact, but I have nothing to compare it to! Oh well, at least We Happy Few looked interesting.
Overall, Microsoft's Press Conference seemed to make them feel like they were leading the charge in the race, but the irony is that they have been behind this entire cycle. They just want to be rid of this cycle, move on, so they can pray Sony messes up, and take back the top spot. The conference was okay,mi can't deny it had some sweet spots, but it had games, and this worked out in their favor for once. I'm glad Xbox showcased so much, but there was nothing but arbitrary bullshit thrown in-between that really doesn't measure up to other conferences I've seen. Ubisoft was rather shitty too, and Bethesda was lacking. I will review their conferences by the beginning of next week, and there will be no Short Story Weekly post this week. Part 2 will be Somy's Press Conference, Part 3 will be a combination of Bethesda, EAPlay, and Ubisoft. If I happen to do a fourth, it will cover Nintendo and other smaller venues.
Thank you so much for reading the Malacast Editorial, as this will be my most extensive coverage of E3, I'll have a ne Short Story Weekly up next week at the earliest, two weeks at the latest. I hope you all enjoy these posts, as they are some of the more extensive posts I do yearly, and the ones I love to do the most, becaue I'm a huge fan of E3, and its crazy history.
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